Upon entering the front doors for the very first time, Ames High School students embark upon a four year journey. This journey will take them in many directions, but, if all goes to plan, the light at the end of the tunnel comes when they cross the stage at graduation and receive their hard-earned diploma. But for one segment of the Ames High population, walking the stage is not permitted.

Ames High does not recognize high school credits that were earned while homeschooling. This means that any student who was homeschooled during freshman and sophomore years has not earned enough Ames High credits to graduate. Instead, the homeschoolers have their own graduation, complete with robes, diplomas, a commencement speaker, and crying parents.

How do homeschoolers feel about this whole arrangement? After all, according to the stereotypical shy nerdiness possessed by a homeschooler, a small, intimate graduation might better suit their tastes and sensibilities. When I asked around, anonymous homeschoolers’ answers to “How do you feel about not getting to graduate from Ames High” ranged from “I think it’s good, we have a small class so it will be a short ceremony” to “I don’t appreciate it,” showcasing the complex state of being homeschooled.

So what does the lack of a homeschool presence at graduation mean to the average Ames High student?  Refer to this nice bullet list:

• There will be a lot less people at graduation. It’s common knowledge that homeschoolers bring a lot of family members everywhere they go, and their absence from the proceedings will free up a lot of seats.

• Would homeschoolers even understand the ceremony? Probably not. Living and educating in a home environment has inoculated them from the normal wares of society. Therefore, they have little idea of the outside world. 🙁

• Their stellar GPAs make many of the rest of us insecure. Seeing as all homeschoolers are veritable geniuses, their cumulative GPAs will be so high that many public schoolers will have to reexamine their educational commitment.

• They are so sincere. When those guys smile, they really mean it. Their sincerity will expose your fake graduation happiness right there in front of your parents and loved ones. “Why can’t you smile like that nice boy over there?”

• Wildcard effect. Seeing as homeschoolers are mystical beings that no one knows anything about, who knows what could happen? Things could get wild.

See you at graduation!

Follow a real live homeschooler on twitter @beriahforney